Late Late Live Tinder w/ Chelsea Handler


>>James: I WAS HOPING YOU
WOULD BE AWAY, I CARE DEEPLY ABOUT EVERYBODY WHO WORKS ON
THIS SHOW, EXCEPT FOR MAYBE ONE GUY, I’M NOT GOING TO NAME
NAMES, GURKS IILLERO. BUT IN ALL SERIOUSNESS, I WANT
THE BEST FOR EVERYONE ON THE SHOW. WHICH IS WHY I HAVE MADE IT MY
MISSION TO FIND LOVE FOR ALL OF OUR SINGLE STAFFERS. NOW OF COURSE NO ONE WHO WORKS
HERE WOULD EVER AGREE TO LET ME TO DO THAT. SO I HAVE TO SURPRISE THEM WITH
THE GIFT OF LOVE VIA A GAME OF LIVE TINDER, OKAY. TODAY, TODAY THE LUCKY STAR, I
AM SURPRISED, SOMEBODY WHO HAS BEEN HERE SINCE THE SHOW
STARTED, NOT ONLY IS SHE ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTFUL TO BE
AROUND, SHE IS INCREDIBLE AT HER JOB AS AN AUDIENCE MANAGER, HEY,
TIFFANY. HOW ARE YOU DOING? (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
HOW ARE YOU?>>I’M GOOD.>>James: ARE YOU OKAY?>>YEAH.>>James: NOW YOU KNOW NOTHING
ABOUT THIS. ARE YOU SHAKING. NOW I– SORRY, I NEED A
MICROPHONE. WAIT THERE. I’M SO SORRY. WE COULDN’T REHEARSE THIS. NOW TIFFANY, EVERYBODY. (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
NOW TIFFANY, YOU ARE– YOU ARE SIJ, CORRECT?ñr
>>VERY MUCH SO.>>James: NOW WHY AND HOW ARE
YOU SINGLE. ARE YOU SO ADORABLE?>>I DON’T KNOW.>>James: IS IT BECAUSE ARE
YOU INCREDIBLY PICKY?>>I THINK I’M SHY.>>James: SHE’S PICKY. NOW WE ARE GOING TO FIX ALL OF
THIS TODAY BECAUSE WE HAVE ARRANGED A GAME OF LIVE TINDER
WITH A BUNCH OF GUYS THAT YOUR FRIENDS HAVE SECRETLY
PRESELECTED FOR YOU BASED ON YOUR TYPE. ARE YOU UP FOR THIS?>>LET’S DO IT.>>James: ARE YOU GOING TO DO
IT? OKAY, GREAT, WHEN WE COME BACK,
WE’RE PLAYING LIVE TINDER WITH TIFFANY. DON’T GO ANYWHERE.>>James: WELCOME BACK. TIFFANY IS HERE. HOW ARE YOU FEELING? ARE YOU OKAY?>>A LITTLE NERVOUS.>>James: YOU DON’T HATE ME,
YOU UP ARE FOR THIS.>>I DON’T HATE YOU. IT WILL BE FUN.>>James: GREAT, WELL, YOU’RE
READY. I’M READY. IT’S TIME TO PLAY LATE, LATE
LIVE TINDER. OKAY. HERE IS HOW THE GAME IS GOING
TO, WITHOUT. THE GUYS WILL COME OUT ONE AT A
TIME INTO THIS BIG PHONE HERE, OKAY. WILL YOU TAKE YOUR BIG FOAM
FINGER AND SWIPE RIGHT IF YOU LIKE THE GUY AND LEFT IF YOU
DON’T. GUYS WITHOUT GET A RIGHT SWIPE
WILL TAKE A SEAT ON ONE OF THESE CHAIRS. THERE ARE ONLY THREE CHAIRS. YOU MAKE THREE CHOICES. GUYS YOU GET A LEFT SWIPE, WILL
YOU FORCED TO FALL INTO THIS PIT HERE, OKAY. BUT DON’T WORRY, YOU DO NOT HAVE
TO MAKE THESE DECISIONS ALONE. BECAUSE WE HAVE SOMEONE HERE TO
HELP YOU. I KNOW ARE YOU A BIG FAN OF AND
SOMEONE I REALLY BELIEVE CAN HELP YOU FIND THE RIGHT GUY. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE
WELCOME CHELSEA HANDLER. (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
>>HI.>>James: THANK YOU, CHELSEA,
THANK YOU SO MUCH.>>WELCOME TO TINDER. WELCOME SWRZ IF WE’RE READY,
LET’S GET STARTED. ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS TURN AROUND
AND LET’S BRING OUT THE FIRST VICTIM, I MEAN MAN. OKAY. WHAT DO WE THINK HERE? LADIES, PLEASE. THIS IS NOT YOUR GAME, MADAME. WHAT– I THINK HE’S KIND OF A
DISH.>>I THINK HE’S CUTE.>>WELL, HELLO, CALM DOWN, FIR
OF ALL.>>James: I’M SAYING GOOD
HAIR, STRONG EYES, NOT SURE ABOUT THE– EVERYTHING ELSE I
LIKE. WHAT DO YOU THINK, TIFFANY, WHAT
IS GOING THROUGH YOUR MIND?>>A LITTLE TOO PERFECT.>>BUT THAT’S OKAY.>>James: EVERY MAN IN AMERICA
IS LOVING YOU RIGHT NOW. I LOVE THAT. YEAH, HE’S TOO PERFECT. SWIPE LEFT, HE’S DONE.>>THAT IS A GOOD CALL THOUGH. THAT’S A GOOD CALL. BECAUSE I WAS LIKE HE’S CUTE,
YOU KNOW, COULD YOU HAVE SEX WITH HIM, BUT YOU’RE RIGHT,
YOU’RE RIGHT.>>James: ALSO I GOT TO SAY,
KIND OF GUY ARE YOU HAVING SEX WITH HIM, LOOKING AT HIMSELF IN
THE MIRROR.>>YEAH.>>James: OH, YEAH, LOOK AT
ME. I LOOK SO GOOD. THAT’S WHAT HE IS DOING. YOU KNOW THAT GUY.>>HOW TERRIBLE FOR EVERYBODY.>>James: BELIEVE ME, IT
DOESN’T, I WANT NO MIRRORS. ALL RIGHT SO LET’S BRING OUT OUR
NEXT MAN. THAT IS A NICE– THAT IS A NICE
SMILE. THAT IS A GOOD SMILE, GUYS.>>WELL, YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL. (LAUGHTER)
>>I SAW YOU BACKSTAGE AND YOU KNOW WHERE TO MEET ME.>>James: WHAT ARE YOU
THINKING, TIFFANY, DO WE LIKE THIS GUY?>>HE LOOKS LIKE HE GIVES GOOD
HUGS.>>James: GIVES GOOD WHAT?>>HUGS.>>James: HUGS, OKAY, GOOD. SWIPING HIM RIGHT. THERE WE GO. LET’S BRING UP OUR NEXT MAN. OKAY. FIRST OF ALL, PRETEN SHUS EYES. HE’S CLEARLY GOT PRETEN SHUS
EYES. TIFFANY, HOW ARE YOU FEEL BEING
THIS GUY?>>SUNGLASSES ASIDE.>>James: WHO ARE YOU, BRITNEY
SPEARS, WHO ARE YOU. SEE YOU LATER. BRING UP OUR NEXT MAN.>>HELLO. OH, HELLO.>>James: YOU CANNOT WINK. CHAD, YOU KNOW THE GAME.>>HE WAS BLINKING, HE WASN’T
WINKING.>>James: THAT WAS IN THE A
BLINK.>>SOMETIMES PEOPLE BLINK WITH
ONE EYE.>>James: HE WAS LITERALLY AN
EMOJI. AND THAT EMOJI WAS AN EGGPLANT. SO– HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THIS
GUY.>>OH, SWIPING RIGHT. THERE WE GO.>>James: OKAY, LET’S BRING UP
OUR NEXT MAN. YES. YOU ALREADY KNOW THAT YOUR MUM
IS GOING TO LOVE THIS GUY, RIGHT? WHAT DO YOU– HOW ARE YOU FEEL
BEING THIS GUY?>>IT’S YOUR DECISION, THIS IS
YOUR LAST GUY SO I WILL LET YOU DECIDE.>>HOW MANY CHOICES.>>James: IF YOU FILL UP THREE
SEATS THEN SOMEONE ELSE COMES OUT, YOU CAN SWAP ONE OF THE
SEATS WITH SOMEONE ELSE. SO DON’T WORRY.>>I WITHOUT TAKE HIM AS A
SAFETY. (LAUGHTER).>>James: HOW ARE YOU FEELING
ABOUT HIM.>>I LIKE MICHAEL. I’M GOING TO– .>>James: IT’S A SWIPE RIGHT. CONGRATULATIONS. LET’S BRING UP OUR NEXT MAN. POPULAR IN THE ROOM. ALL I’M GOING TO SAY. AN AUDIBLE DAMN! FROM THE BACK THERE. TIFFANY, WHAT’S GOING THROUGH
YOUR MIND.>>HE HAS A GOOD SMILE, NICE
EYES.>>James: CHELSEA.>>YOU’RE PRETTY TOUGH. HE LOOKS LIKE THE FIRST GUY. DOESN’T I, WITH HIS HAIR SWOOPED
TO THE OTHER SIDE. HE’S HANDSOME. YOU CAN TELL HE IS A FIES GUY.>>James: WHAT ARE YOU GOING
TO DO, ARE YOU GOING TO SWAP SOMEONE OUT OR SWIPE HIM LEFT.>>I THINK I’M GOING TO– .>>James: HANG ON, ARE WE
MAKING A SWAP.>>I THINK WE’RE GOING TO MAKE A
SWAP.>>James: WHO ARE YOU SWAPPING
OUTLINING WE DON’T ALREADY KNOW.>>STEVEN.>>James: OH, NO. WHAT? OH, THAT BOMBSHELL WHICH NO ONE
SAW COMING, STEVEN, I’M SO SORRY, YOU SEEMED SO SAFE AND
YET YOU ARE GONE WITH A SWIPE. DAVID, TAKE HIS SEAT, STEVEN,
GET IN THE VAULT. (APPLAUSE)
>>IT’S SO DEGRADING THAT THEY HAVE TO GET THROWN IN THE BALLS
AND CLIMB OUT OF THE BALLS. AND THEN WALK.>>James: ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY
RIGHT. THAT’S THE DEGRADING BIT ABOUT
THIS. AND THIS IS OUR LAST MAN KOSMING
UP NOW, TIFFANY. CHELSEA, GET READY. LET’S BRING OUT OUR LAST MAN. (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
I’M GOING TO STAY– I KNOW HOW I FEEL. RIGHT, SO TIFFANY WHAT ARE WE
THINK BEING JUNIOR.>>I LIKE JUNIOR.>>James: YEAH, ME TOO. WHAT IS THE CHOICE YOU’RE GOING
TO MAKE, TIFFANY?>>I’LL SWAP.>>James: OH MY GOSH. WHO ARE YOU GOING TO SWAP OUT
THOUGH, TIFFANY, WHO ARE YOU GOING TO SWAP?>>I THINK I’M GOING TO SWAP
JUNIOR AND CHAD.>>CHAD, ARE YOU IN THE BALLS. JUNIOR, YOU ARE ON THE SEAT. WELL DONE TO OUR FINAL THREE.>>SORRY, CHAD.>>James: COME IS RAISE, WERE
YOU SO CLOSE, CONGRATULATIONS TO OUR THREE FINALISTS. (APPLAUSE)
SO HERE WE ARE, OUR GUYS HERE, GUYS, TELL URS YOUR NAMES AND
WHERE ARE YOU FROM?>>MY NAME IS JUNIOR, I’M FROM
MONTREAL, CANADA.>>OH.>>I’M DAVID, I’M FROM DETROIT,
MICHIGAN.>>James: OKAY.>>MY NAME IS MICHAEL, I’M FROM
GILBERT, ARIZONA.>>James: OKAY. NOW TIFFANY, YOU HAVE THE
OPPORTUNITY NOW TO ASK THE GUYS ONE QUESTION, ALL RIGHT. CHELSEA, WHAT IS THE QUESTION
YOU WOULD LIKE TO ASK A GUY IF YOU WANT TO HELP TIFFANY ON
THIS?>>WHAT– HOW– DO — HOW OFTEN
DO YOU LIE?>>James: TIFFANY, IS THAT A
GOOD QUESTION? YOU CAN GO WITH THAT OR YOU CAN
ASK YOUR OWN.>>WE’LL STICK WITH MINE.>>WHAT IF THEY LIE?>>I WILL TELL YOU, I CAN TELL
WHEN PEOPLE ARE LYING.>>James: TIFER FEE WENT, WHAT
IF THEY LIE, CHELSEA, I KNOW, I CAN TELL WHEN THEY ARE LYING. DO YOU WANT TO GO WITH THAT.>>NO, NO, DO YOUR OWN QUESTION,
COME ON, DO IT, I’M JUST JOKING.>>WE’LL GO WITH THAT ONE.>>YOU ARE THE ONE THAT HAS TO
HAVE SEX WITH THEM. YOU ASK YOUR OWN. COME ON, COME ON.>>HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIE.>>James: HOW OFTEN DO YOU
LIE, JUNIOR.>>ONLY IF I WANT TO SURPRISE MY
GIRL.>>WOW.>>James: JUNIOR, PLEASE,
NEVER HAS A MAN LOOKED MORE FULL OF [BLEEP] THAN YOU DO RIGHT
NOW. DAVID, HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIE?>>NEVER.>>James: OH, GUYS, WE HAVE
PICKED THE WRONG DUDE HERE, YOU NEVER LIE, SAID LIKE A TRUE
LIAR. MICHAEL, HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIE?>>FROM THE MOMENT I WAKE UP TO
THE MOMENT I GO TO BED. WELL, IT’S DECISION TIME. CHELSEA, WHO WOULD YOU PICK IF
YOU WERE IN THIS RIGHT NOW.>>DAVID.>>James: YOU WOULD BICK
DAVID.>>YEAH, SUPERCUTE. AND HE LOOKS HONEST.>>James: AND HE LOOKS HONEST. HE HAS HONEST EYES.>>HE DUSKER RIGHT.>>James: HE DOES. TIFFANY, WHO ARE YOU GOING TO
TAKE ON YOUR DATE?>>I CAN’T BELIEVE I THOUGHT I
WAS COMING OUT HERE FOR AN INTERVIEW.>>I ACTUALLY THINK I AGREE WITH
CHELSEA AND I’M GOING TO GO WITH DAVID.>>James: THANKS FOR PLAYING. THANKS FOR PLAYING, MICHAEL. COME AND MEET TIFFANY. TIFFANY, MEET DAVID.>>NICE TO MEET YOU.>>James: WELL, GUYS, THIS IS
BEAUTIFUL. OKAY. SO WHAT WE’RE GOING TO DO
NOW– THEY DIDN’T EVEN HAVE TO JUMP IN THE BALLS. THEY JUST WANTED TO. WELL, GUYS, HERE IS WHAT IS
GOING TO HAPPEN NOW. I AM SENDING THE BOTH OF YOU
DOWN THE HALL FOR A DATE IN QUUN OF OUR, AND HAVE I TO SAY, ONE
OF OUR MOST ROMANTIC CONFERENCE ROOMS IN ALL OF TELEVISION CITY. SO HOLD LAND HANDS, OFF YOU GO. YOU GO DOWN THERE. TIFFANY AND DAVID, WE’LL CHECK
YOU LATER, CHELSEA HANDLER, EVERYBODY. WE’LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH CHELSEA
AND PETER KRAUSE.>>THAT WAS A LITTLE
NERVE-RACKING.

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