Key & Peele – Obama Shutdown

Key & Peele – Obama Shutdown


[jazz music starts playing] ♪ ♪ [clears throat] – OH, HONEY,
I AM TIRED. I AM GOING TO BED. GOOD NIGHT. – UH, WELL… [laughs] – IS EVERYTHING OKAY? – WELL, THAT’S, UH– IT’S–IT’S JUST
THAT I WAS HOPING THAT– WELL, THAT WE COULD– AND I-I WANNA MAKE
THIS CLEAR. I-I-I WANNA
BE STRAIGHTFORWARD. I WANT TO HAVE A– – OKAY.
UH, LUTHER? ARE YOU AVAILABLE
TO TRANSLATE? – YES, MA’AM. [clears throat] – I REALLY WAS HOPING WE COULD
SPEND SOME TIME TOGETHER. – WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME
WE HAD SEX, WOMAN? REELECTION NIGHT? WHAT DOES A BROTHER
NOT NAMED “BILL CLINTON” HAVE TO DO TO GET SOME [bleep]
IN THIS HOUSE? – WELL, YOU HAVE BEEN
VERY BUSY LATELY. – MM-HMM.
MM-HMM. YOU KNOW WHAT? IF I COULD J–CAN
WE GET YOUR TRANSLATOR? – OH, YES, CERTAINLY.
UH, CATENDRA? – YEAH, HONEY? – COULD YOU PLEASE TRANSLATE “WELL, YOU HAVE BEEN
VERY BUSY LATELY.” – SURE.
– HM. – MY [bleep] AIN’T
ONE OF YOUR LIMOUSINES THAT YOU CAN JUMP
IN AND OUT OF WHENEVER YOU FEEL LIKE. I DON’T SEE YOU
ALL DAY, THEN YOU WANT
A BOOTY CALL? I NEED AN EMOTIONAL
CONNECTION, [bleep]. – THOUGHT THIS WAS ROMANTIC. – I’M [bleep]IN’
TRYIN’, BITCH! CAN’T YOU SEE? I’M PLAYIN’
THE ROMANTIC MUSIC. I GOT THE PINOT
IN THE GLASSES. WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT
FROM ME? AN ENGRAVED INVITATION
FROM MY NUTS? – MAYBE WE SHOULD MAKE
A DATE. – WHAT AM I SUPPOSED
TO DO, JUMP OUT OF MY CLOTHES
EVERY TIME LITTLE BARRY STANDS
AT ATTENTION? YOU AIN’T MY COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF,
MOTHER-[bleep], AND MY VAGINA AIN’T SOME CAVE
IN THE MIDDLE EAST YOU CAN FLY
YOUR HEAT-SEEKING MISSILE INTO WHENEVER YOU FEEL
LIKE IT. – WELL, I-I DIDN’T MEAN
TO CALL YOU, BUT I-I HAD MEETINGS
ALL DAY LONG. – I’M DEALIN’ WITH THESE
MOTHER-[bleep] REPUBLICANS HEARIN’ “NO, NO, NO”
ALL DAY LONG. THEN I COME HOME,
AND YOU AIN’T GONNA LET ME GET MY JAM ON
UP IN HERE? – WELL, YOU KNOW,
I HAVE HAD A BUSY DAY TOO. – YOU ACT LIKE I AIN’T GOT
NOTHIN’ ELSE TO DO, [bleep]. I GOT
THESE OBESE MOTHER-[bleep] ON MY ASS 24/7. WHAT’S MORE IMPORTANT–
YOU GETTIN’ YOUR WICK DIPPED OR SOME EIGHT-YEAR-OLD FAT-ASS
COLLAPSIN’ IN HIS BUNK BED? – OKAY. – YOU SEEM TO BE FORGETTIN’
JOB NUMBER ONE. YOU ARE MY SECRETARY
OF [bleep], BITCH! GET TO WORK! – YOU.
[chuckles] [groaning and moaning] – LUTHER?
CATENDRA? – OH, YES, YES, SIR. – WE’LL–WE’LL TAKE IT
FROM HERE. – ABSOLUTELY–YES, SIR.
– YES, MA’AM. – GOOD NIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT. – [laughs] [chuckles] – COME HERE.
– OH, THIS FEELS GOOD. – UM, MOM?
DAD? I KNOW YOU ALREADY SAID
THAT I CAN’T GO, BUT CAN I PLEASE GO
TO THE PARTY TONIGHT? – MALIA, USE YOUR TRANSLATOR. – IF YOU DON’T LET ME GO
TO THIS PARTY, I WILL GET A TATTOO ON MY FACE. – HAVE FUN.
– YEAH.

100 thoughts on “Key & Peele – Obama Shutdown

  1. I like to think anger translators are like stands, yes it's a jojo reference, if you got it good, if not Google it, you'll get a good chuckle.

  2. Is that woman supposed to be playing Michele Obama? She too light! Why is the loud woman the right complexion?

  3. I like how it's fine — and humorous — to show a woman slapping a man across the face, but can you imagine the reaction if HE had slapped HER? People would be demanding to have Comedy Central taken off the air.

  4. This is some top notch sketch writing.. Im getting more and more impressed of Jordan Peele, and Key by every step they take. Layers man..

  5. Her hergina flying all over in the middle east like a RPG, missile etc…hhhhhhhhh. ……please go and bring it back….hhhh

  6. I wish I had a translator.
    'WHY DON'T I HAVE A TRANSLATOR? ARE OTHERS MORE DESERVING THAN ME? WHY DOES NOTHING GOOD HAPPEN TO ME? ** THIS PLANET.'

  7. You don't know what you have until it's gone! Damn, come back Barack Hussein Obama! We miss you so much!

  8. All Michele Obama did was make school lunches shitty not healthy and make it so the kids who already don't eat well or even get much food to eat at home have even less. So yea I guess she did handle obesity its hard to be fat when ur starving, real easy decision to make when your kids go to a private school and get 5 star restaurant like meals

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